People are easily forgotten.

So I'm officially taking an extra year at school. I don't know why I'm making such a big deal about this...maybe because I could've made it out in four. I had a meeting with Dr. Marshall about it, and he said that it would be good, and it'll just prepare me better for a job. Yeah, that's what I think, too. Besides, what are the odds that I'll find a job in the middle of the year? *Sigh*...I still feel really weird about it.

I got a postcard from Victor today. He's being a good boy and saying no to STDs. Good boy, Vicki, good boy :)

We had our first orchestra concert today. It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. There were a couple times during the concert when Mr. Najar looked like he was about to kill a certain pianist, but that's okay...nothing fell apart. After the concert, Miles, Andrew Kang, my Andrew and I went out to eat. We went to Wolfgang Puck Express. It was bad...it wasn't great either. One good thing that came out of it - Andrew ran into an old manager that really likes him, and I think he's gonna get a job there. That means he can quit Ted's! YAY! Ted's sucks...well, the management and the money sucks, but the food doesn't. Those are some damn good burgers.

I'm thinking about taking an extra year. I used to care about getting out in four years and everything, but it doesn't matter anymore. I know that I could've gotten out in four years, that's all that matters. I chose to take extra time. It's better this way, I think. I get to do what I want to do, ya know? I don't have to explain or prove myself to anyone. As long as I'm happy...I wish my parents would understand that. All they care about it me getting through school and getting married and having babies. They don't even know what my plans are for the next ten years, not that I do either, but still. At least I have an idea of what I want.

Eh...whatever.

Andrew and I are going on a double date with Bart and Liz tonight. It's exciting because it's a blind date for them. I think they'll get along well....or at least I hope. I don't want this to be some sort of traumatizing experience for either of them. I'm sure it'll be fine.

School's been pretty busy. I don't think people believe me when I tell them that I couldn't do certain things because I'm busy. Why don't they believe me? Well, I guess it's not really only school though. It's gigs too. I've been getting gigs up the butt. Everyone wants to freakin' get married in October! Can't blame them...that's when I wanna get married too. Andrew wants to get married during summer or spring. Yeah...I'm gonna get married. Speaking of marriage all that other good stuff, Andrew and I got invitations to Whitney Hurford and Corey's wedding shower (not really a bridal shower b/c I think both of them are going to be there). How exciting! I can't believe she's getting married. It seems like only yesterday she and I were sitting in Joe's Crab Shack, talking about this guy named Corey that she's interested in :) Those two make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

Gil Shaham played with ASO this weekend. Mendelssohn Violin Concerto! It was GREAT. It was more than great. The concert in general was awesome, not only because of Gill Shaham, but because in the second half of the concert, ASO played Mahler 5. It was great. Andrew just about peed his pants when all the brass started playing really loud. It was a good night. I went with Whitney on Friday and went with Andrew on Saturday. On Friday I had no problems seeing because we were on the second balcony, front row. On Saturday, this really tall annoying guy sat right in front of me and I just about broke my neck trying to see Gil. It was extra annoying because he kept nodding and moving his head to the music. HELLO~! That's the worst thing anyone could possibly do at a recital or concert. Geez. Anyways, the tall man and his short Asian woman freakin' left after the Mendelssohn. ARGH.

Kennehh is rubbing Angelina Jolie's face all over his nipples. Go nipples, go!

I went to Lassiter HS to observe and talk to the orchestra director there. She's cool. I have a feeling that if I did my student teaching there, we're talk A LOT. Anyways, she thinks that I should do part of my student teaching with a band. Dr. Marshall doesn't think that would be a good idea, unless I want to do it with a middle school or something. Come on...if I'm gonna do student teaching with a band, I want a freakin' good band. Of course Lassiter has a kick ass band program. Hmmm...I just need to think about this a little more.

My mind's been a little off lately. Too much thinking or lack of thinking, I can't decide which one it is. All I know is, I've been feeling weird.

I'm at school right now. I just spoke with Dr. Ambrose about auditioning for the pep band. Why am I doing this you ask? Well...to tell you the truth, I'm not really sure. I mean, it would be great to get the band experience or whatever since I don't know what that's like being a string person, but yeah...not sure. On top of that, I'm learning how to play the "Devil's instrument" aka Mellophone. I don't know why people say that it's so horrible. It's actually not that bad, and I"m not bad at playing it. I think it has something to do with confidence. I don't have enough confidence to play this instrument. Afterall, I picked it up only a week ago. Hmm...things to think about.

The friend didn't let go. The monster got him...it got him real bad....

Hello everyone. So last night wasn't as painful as I described...wait, did I say it was painful last night? I can't remember what I wrote. Anyways, I got to know Tabitha a little bit, and she's cool. I think we're gonna get along just fine. They're so happy together. I'm really glad that Chris finally found someone that makes him happy...giddy's more like it. I've never seen him giggle like a school girl until yesterday. Kinda freaked me out...
Back to school tomorrow. I don't wanna go! There's too much to do. I have an observation report due tomorrow for orchestration, journal stuff for EPSF and a whole lot of other crap...but that's all okay because my other boyfriend is coming to town on Thursday through Saturday to play with the ASO. Gil Shaham, baby! Man, I'm sooo excited. I'm gonna try to go see him every all three nights. I mean, when else am I gonna get a chance to see my favorite violinist play my favorite violin concerto? It's gonna be absolutely amazing. I CAN'T WAIT!
It was my dad's birthday on Friday. We got him the printer/copier thingie and he liked it. My sister made him an ice cream cake from Cold Stone (she works there). It was all slanted and stuff. On Saturday afternoon, we all went to this buffet place in Duluth. It was okay. Andrew went with us. I think it's kinda weird how my parents are always telling me that I need to meet a nice Korean guy and get married, but they're always inviting Andrew to family functions. I think he's been to almost all birthday dinners in the past two years. Anyways, we laughed a lot b/c my family is crazy as hell. Good times, good times...
On the same day as my dad's birthday, one of my friends went on an adventure to visit an old monster from the past. I mean, really...let it go, man! Rather, the monster needs to let this friend go. Ignore the monster. It's no good for you. It'll stop bothering you if you stop listening to it, okay?

I'm at Georgia Southern right now. We came down here to see Chris and meet his new girlfriend. Yes, after not having a girlfriend for like 6 years, he's found a girl who is worthy of his time. Isn't that sweet? Aww...anyways, they seem really happy together. I'm not sure what to think of her though. I guess I don't know what to think of her b/c I don't know her. I mean, usually I can tell what kinda person someone is when I first meet them, but with her, I can't tell. Anyways, as long as they're happy, I'm happy too.
So there's absolutely nothing to do down here. How can anyone spend 4 years or more of their lives in a place where there's nothing to do? It took us like, an hour to decide where to eat b/c our choices are so freakin' limited...that and Chris didn't really plan for us to do anything or something. He's not a good host at all. I guess being a guy, he doesn't really think about that, but still. His best friend drove 3 hours to see him and he's gonna be a terrible host. Good job, guy.

I'm sitting in my room with my sister, and she's talking about how skinny one of her friends is because she took ADD medication. Now she wants to take it. And the guy that she has a crush on thinks that the skinny friend is hot. It made her jealous. Oh, the woos of teenage life.
Anyways, my dad's birthday is in two days. We're getting him a copier/printer. Yay.
I have a lot of gigs coming up. For this one gig, I have to play in a quartet of freshmen. Yeah, they're definitely freshmen. Naturally, I don't give them enough credit. I mean, come on...they're my little sister's age! Hmm, I hope I wasn't too rough on them. I just get the feeling that they haven't had enough experience with gigs. Oh well, they'll learn.

Do only sad and lonely people have online journals?

It's 8am right now. I can't take a shower because my stupid sister NEEDS to listen to the radio while she's drying her hair. ARGH...I really want to move out, but at the same time, I don't. My family needs me at home, but it's such a pain in the ass living here. Damnit, why do I have to be such a nice person?? (haha).

Andrew called me at 2am this morning to tell me that his best friend got a girlfriend. He hasn't had a relationship in a really long time, so we're really happy for him. He's a great guy! He deserves the best. Hopefully this girl is what he's been looking for all these years. Anyways, Andrew said that he called him all excited about his new girl and stuff. Ahh, new love. It's a good thing. I remember when Andrew and I first got together. Everything was so new and exciting. We couldn't stay away from each other for more than a couple hours at a time. I remember one weekend, he went down to Georgia Southern to see his friend and we didn't see each other for an entire weekend. When he came back, I told him to never to that again :) Love is such a great thing. It's amazing that Andrew and I have been together for two years. Two years! That's a long freakin' time! And we're still in love with each other. He's the best thing that's ever happened to me, and I love him sooo much. I hope Andrew's best friend can experience the same thing with his new girl.

So...the second week of school. I feel like I'm on overload already. I'm trying really hard to be good this year since it's the last year of academics, but man, it's hard. I have too many performance things to worry about, plus CMENC and commuting everyday. Yeah. It kinda sucks. I feel like last year was a better year. I really miss people who were here last year. Little things remind me of the people that I miss, and it's making me kinda sad. I guess there are just some things that I'm never going to get back (like the freakin' past) and I need to just move on with my life. Why should I dwell on something that's long gone, right? It's not like the past is going to come looking for me. Bygones...

Next Friday is my dad's birthday. We're definitely not going to forget about it this year. In 2001, we forgot about it. It was the day after the terriorist attack in NY and DC. September 12th...I can't believe we forgot it. We realized it like a week after. My sister cried. We felt really, really bad about it. But this year, we're not going to forget. I think we're gonna get him a printer/copy machine. He needs one. Besides, it's been a really long time since he's had a new toy to play with.

Victor left. He's gone for a WHOLE FREAKIN' YEAR. :(

Yesterday I had a meeting with my advisor about what I should do with the rest of my life. I told him that I definitely want to stay in music, I just don't know what it is that I want to do with music. I don't feel like I'm good enough to do performance, I don't think I want to do education...I told him that I have an interest in conducting, and he told me that conducting degrees are bullshit. Actually, he didn't really say that. He just said that he has this thing against conducting degrees b/c you don't really get to conduct all that much. He told me that I would get more "stick time" if I teach in a school. Hmm...yeah. Needless to say, it wasn't a very productive meeting. I still don't know what the hell I want to do with the rest of my freakin' life. I think I'm gonna have to go with my back up plan: marry Prince William. Does anyone have his number?

It was Labor Day. Didn't do much, really. The family went out for lunch. Of course we had to argue about where to go, what to eat for about an hour before we actually decided on a place. Why does it have to be so difficult to be a family?? Geez...anyways, afterwards we came home, and Gloria wanted to go bowling, so we went (Gloria, Andrew and I went). I bowled a 136! Isn't that veird??
Vicki leaves in a day. A DAY. And after that, it's a whole year without Victor. That makes me sad :( At the same time, I'm really excited for him. He's gonna be in Paris! No, not Paris, Texas...France! He's gonna be surrounded by good cheese, wine and beautiful, hairy women. Hmm...don't get too close to them though...say no to STDs, Vicki!
Why can't all the people in my life just stay here? I'm sick of missing people.