Your Birthdate: January 17

You tend to find yourself lucky - both in business and in life.And while being wealthy is nice, you enjoy sharing your abundance with others.You put your luck to good use: you are very ambitious and goal oriented.Often times, you get over excited and take on more than you can manage. Your strength: Your ability to make your own luck Your weakness: Thinking you can do it all Your power color: Bronze Your power symbol: Half Moon Your power month: August

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

Growing up really freakin' sucks. There are so many bills to pay, it's absolutely ridiculous. My birthday is next month, and you'd think that it's something to celebrate, right? Nooo, I have to pay car taxes. Over $400! AAAAARGHGHHHH...plus school loan, credit card, phone bill, car payment, insurance, parents...

You know what? I take back everything I said about relaxing in yesterday's entry. I'm stressed out.

I'm on break, but the past week hasn't felt like break. You know when you're in college, and you're on break, you basically sit on your ass for a month and do nothing but eat your mom's cooking and poop? Well, I've not been doing that at all, and that's not break. I've been baking, shopping, blah, blah, blah non-stop for a week. It's very stressful, and I was starting to hate Christmas. I wanted it to be OVER. And now that it is, I'm definitely more relaxed. I've been sleeping till 10am (which I NEVER do), I've been reading my books, watching TV, eating (waaay too much) and other not stressful things. YAY. BREAK. Don't be over...EVER.

Today, I hung out with mostly Bob and Andrew, but Vicki joined us for lunch at Yin Jing. It was good...but man, there was some serious MSG in the food. No wonder Bob likes it so much. Afterwards, we took him to the wonderful world of Super H Mart. He bought two gallons of kimchee and a pound of chili powder (he really doesn't want the bird flu). Then we went to Andrew's watched a movie and played this card game called Nerts (or somehting like that).

Andrew's graduation party is on Friday night. Y'all should all come. I'm making desserts.

Being Korean sucks when:

1. You can't get your point across while arguing with your parents because you're lacking in Korean and they're lacking in English.
2. They treat you like they own you, but they expect you to be a grown up and take on responsibilities (GOD, I HATE THAT ONE...DAMNIT!)
3. You can't live your life because of what you have to do for your family.
4. Your parents guilt you into doing stuff for them because they "sacrificed their lives in Korea to come to America, where they don't have any family and they don't know the language so that you can have a good education and better life."
5. The people at church get all up into your business, and your parents care so much that they make up shit to cover for your ass whenever you fuck up (WHY CAN'T THEY JUST DEAL WITH THE FACT THAT WE'RE NOT ALL PERFECT?).
6. You can't talk about the way you feel with your parents and if you show any emotions at all, they think you've gone mad, and their way of dealing with it is to say, "What's wrong with you?" as if they're offended by your behavior.
7. Even when your parents know you're completely right, and you know they're completely wrong, talking back is not allowed because it's disrespectful to do that to your parents.
8. Did I mention they treat me like a middle schooler that doesn't know anything?
9. They say, "Only if you did this or that, I really wouldn't say anything to you about when you go out late" or anything else they think is out of their control, even if you've done everything and anything that they'd expect you to do, like put yourself through school, make your own money, and even support others in the process.
10. They can't fucking get into their heads that you're a fucking grown up with a fucking job, and they can't fucking let go.

So yeah. That's that.

It's Wednesday. Christmas Eve is Saturday. I haven't done a bit of shopping. And I still have like, 12 cookie baskets to make for church. Boooo...

Yesterday, we had this whole birthday thing for Victor. We (Bart, Tanya, Shelley (Bart's sister), and I) took him to the aquarium, then we went out for Jcha-jchong mein, then we did a little (very little) shopping, then we went to Joe's for trivia. We got 3rd place! I think that's the first time I ever did trivia with a group that placed anything at Joe's. Anyways, Victor seemed to be having a good time. He had lots of different people there. It was a great mix of people, they were all super nice and talkive. Except for Armando. But I think he's just kinda like that.

Friends are good :) Even if it took a while to get to know them.

I think I'm having an identify crisis. It's rather late for one, isn't it? People usually go through the whole, "who am I" thing in high school and college. I guess I'm not really asking that specific question, but my beliefs and wants and needs are shifting, I think, and it's confusing me. What do I want with my life and how far am I willing to go to get it?

The Falcons got their ass kicked in last night. It was the most depressing game ever. By the end of the 3rd quarter, I couldn't watch. It was too painful.

I played in a wedding today up in Rabun Gap, GA. During the ceremony, I realized how serious getting married is, and I really don't think that I could ever do it. It seems too...grown up and serious. I know that I'm in a fairly serious relationship right now, I mean, it has lasted for more than 4 years, but I dunno. I just can't imagine getting married and having kids and driving them around in a minivan.

Maybe I'm afraid of change. Maybe I'm afraid of committment. Maybe I'm afraid to grow up. Maybe I'm really bad at letting go of things.

Is there something wrong with me?

My favorite thing about the holidays is seeing friends who come back home for it. And my second favorite thing is the fact that I don't have to go to school for two freakin' weeks. YAY~!!

Victor and I went to my co-worker's (George) Christmas party last night. Needless to say, it was weird seeing so many of the other teachers/administrators outside the school...I guess in a social gathering. I mean, it's one thing if we're eating lunch at school together, but at a party? I just don't think it works. We pretty much sat on the couch and kept to ourselves. They probably think I hate them now, which isn't true. It's just they're all so much older than I am, and I don't know any of them very well. Victor kept saying I'm super anti-social. Am I really that bad? I wasn't like this in college. Hmm...maybe being a middle school teacher isn't the best thing for my social life (ha...go figure).

What is it about weddings that gets people so worked up? I understand that it's the holy union of two people who love each other, but still...

I just spent the last two hours watching the wedding edition of Queer Eye for the Straight Guy and cried for about half of it. The way he proposed, the ring, the church where they got married, the reception...it was all so beautiful and classy and elegant - it was perfect. And for about 10 seconds it made me think that I want a big, fancy fairytale kind of wedding.

I wonder if guys ever feel that way.

Last night, I saw Jump Little Children at Eddie's Attic for their acoustic show. It was really good. I can't believe they're not a band anymore. It really makes me sad to think that something that I've been chasing after, listening to, obsessing over for the last 7 years is now...well, not there anymore. SIGH.

It's been fairly crazy around here. I have gig after gig, Christmas presents to buy, students to teach, parties to attend, a concert to get ready for...I really can't wait till the 19th. That's when it's all over.