My student's neck broke off!

The flan turned out great, so I decided to make another one for the Secret Santa get together that my friends and I had over at the Garrett-Gardner residence. It was quite tasty as well....although, the first one was better. Yep, I'm a bad ass.

Christmas was quite stressful until the day of. I was shopping right up until we had to go to Andrew's parents' for Christmas Eve dinner. I've pretty much decided that people have definitely forgotten what Christmas is about. It's become too much about buying presents and all that, and it's really getting me depressed. Okay, so maybe I wouldn't be so depressed this time of year if I had more money and time to actually prepare and get in the mood.

Either way, everything's done and over with. All the presents were opened, all the food eaten, and in the end, I had a pretty good time with friends and family. Andrew did very well this year with the presents. He knocked out three out of 10 things from the Christmas wishlist without even looking at it. You wanna know what he said? He said, "Baby, I don't need to read your blog to know what you want for Christmas...I know you." hehe...I guess I underestimated his gifting abilities.

Lately I've been thinking a lot about what I should be doing with my life. Yes, I have a job right now that's full time, has a salary and has great benefits. So why should I be thinking about doing something else, right? Good question. Why can't I be happy with what I have? Probably because it's too hard and I don't want to deal with it. Man, that makes me sound like a complete quitter.

I'm making flan for the first time. I really, really hope it turns out well. There's nothing like failed baked goods to make you feel like a failure at life.

I got together with an old friend tonight. He told me the big news - he's going to propose to his girlfriend sometime this month so they can get married next December. It's so freakin' weird. I never thought that he'd ever say those words to me. Here's why:

1) He's only 22! Barely older than my little sister! That's waaay too young to get married. I think I'm too young, being 24. Marriage is just so serious, and people shouldn't just go about doing it without really thinking about it...hard...like super duper hard.

2) They've only been dating for 2 years. I guess being in a relationship of a little over 5 years and still not feeling ready to "settle down," I think 2 years is a little too soon to be seriously thinking about marriage.

3) It's just weird to think that he's getting married. I dunno...it's just weird.

Also, it's funny that I bumped into him today and found out about this, because just last night I had a conversation with a friend about marriage and all that, and I said something like, "I just don't feel like I'm ready or even close to it." And he said, "Well, can you really imagine yourself ever saying, 'I'm ready to get married'?" The truth is, I don't think i can...not right now, not anytime soon. Maybe it's because Andrew's so far away, or I'm not making enough money. I just don't feel old enough to do something like that. I know I have a real job that pays real money now, but I don't feel any older than I did 5 years ago. Will I ever feel like I'm ready for it? Maybe what Victor said is right - you don't really realize that you're ready for it until it happens. Wait...does that even make any sense?

People change. Time makes them change. Situations make them change. Sometimes, I really don't like that change.

This week's gonna be hell. I'm not gonna get a chance to go home before 9pm almost every night this week. SIGH.

Last night, a couple of the Korean girls who are co-workers came over after a rehearsal for a gig. We had...SOJU! My first time! I got pretty excited about it. Apparently, there are rules to drinking soju.

1) You can't pour yourself a drink, otherwise the person in front of you will have bad luck for 3 years.
2) You can't pour more soju into a glass that already has some in it.
3) You have to eat pork belly sahm with it.

Personally, I think that's a little too much to prepare for drinking.

Anyways, the soju was pretty weak. The night before, my drinking buddy came over, and we had shots of vodka. Compared to vodka, the Korean stuff was nothing. Didn't really matter, I suppose because it definitely served its purpose (of course, it doesn't take much with the Korean folks...man, they can't handle their alcohol). One of the girls got pretty drunk, talked trash to a friend that I "drunk" dialed (I put it in quotations because I wasn't really drunk, but i was still drinking), and passed out while saying, "No, we can't sleep..." Hehe...it was funny.

The "deep thought" moment during the drunkenness was when one of the girls said, "Grace, you're not all Korean. You're really American too." I guess that's true, but I don't know how I feel about that. Just because I'm not a FOB, I don't act like one and I don't have an accent when i speak English, does that mean I'm not all Korean? I've always wondered why Korean girls never tried to be friends with me. It's not like they looked down on me or were mean to me, but they all seemed to always clump together and always hang out and stuff, but I was never invited. Is it because I'm not Korean enough? It just sucks sometimes because I feel like I don't really feel completely comfortable in either group. If I'm with a whole bunch of Korean people, I feel slightly strange. If I'm with a whole bunch of white people, and I'm the only Asian, I really feel weird. I guess there's really no way to get over it...except to not think about too much, maybe.

:: Ode to Pho ::

Pho, I love you so
So full of animal parts
Noodles and beef broth

I impulse bought a laptop on Friday, so I guess I can cross off that one. I literally woke up that morning and thought, "Hey....I think I'm going to buy a laptop today." It was during that still sleeping but awake state, but I said it to myself with such...conviction...so I guess I convinced myself that way. That night, I went to Fry's and bought one. That's bad...really, really bad.

In place of the laptop thing on my list, I'd like to add the following:

2. a really hot laptop carrier bag...by prada

Christmas Wishlist (just in case someone wants to be generous):

1) Kitchen Aid stand mixer
2) a laptop
3) Allure (I'm running out)
4) new pjs and slippers
5) Caphalon saucepan
6) earrings
7) new cell phone
8) vanilla scented candles
9) West Wing, the complete series
10) a really good drum and bass cd

That's it for now. If you have any questions, please feel free to comment.

Break's almost over. Thanksgiving has come and gone. It really doesn't feel like the other Thanksgivings...probably because I don't have any leftovers to stuff myself silly (they're all at my parents). Dinner went very well. In fact, it was pretty awesome. Andrew says that my dinner was better than his mom's (we had two dinners that day...OY...). Yep. Once again, a successful Thanksgiving dinner, made from start to finish by yours truly.

Let's recap on the happenings of this lovely Thanksgiving break:

1) Tuesday night a couple friends came over and we drank and played GameCube stuff. Bryan and David brought nasty beer and got drunk, Natascha brought over pumpkin pie (she made it here) and Andrew was schooling all of them on the ways of the Game Cube. It was nice and relaxing. By the end of the night, David and Bryan were passed out. The next morning, we all went out for breakfast at IHOP. I had pumpkin pancakes...mmm...

2) On Wednesday night I went over to my parents to prep for the next day. I put the turkey in the brine, but I pretty much spent all night baking. I made apple pie (my first one!) and pumpkin cheesecake to take to Andrew's parents' house. They were good, I guess. I didn't puree the cottage cheese that goes into the cheesecake enough so the texture wasn't quite right, and I sliced the apples too thin for the pie, so they got too soft...but overall, it tasted good. Baking's so hard.

3) Thanksgiving day! I got up around 8am to start cooking. I got the turkey in the oven (*side note: I saw a thing on one of the cooking shows where they put wine and butter soaked cheesecloth over the turkey to keep the moisture and "encourage" it to brown evenly, so I tried it, and it worked really, really well...I think it was the best turkey I'd ever made), starting cutting up some of the veggies and such. Really, I didn't cook all day. I mean, yes, I was in the kitchen all day, but I wasn't cooking the whole time. I had little breaks here and there. I couldn't really do much until the turkey was out of the oven (which is why I need a house with a kitchen that has two ovens in it...ahem...). Thanks to my boyfriend with high tolerance of my bossiness, we got everything on the table only 10 minutes behind schedule. Man...it was a lot of food. Andrew looked at the table and was like, "Baby...this is SO MUCH FOOD." I really cooked everything that I had on my previous menu posting (minus bread pudding and souffle). We ate the hell out of everything and everyone was pretty much ready to pass out within the next hour. We still had half of everything leftover. Man, I can't wait till I go home today...

4) Yesterday we just hung out. Andrew and I went to go see Casino Royale with Bryan and David. It was a really good movie. It definitely exceeded my expectations. We also went to eat...a lot. Andrew and I had lunch at Whole Foods ( I heart Whole Foods), then after the movie we ate at Taco Mac (because Bryan wanted beer, duh). After Taco Mac, we went to my parents and rescued Coco (she was NOT happy about being at my parents, and I don't blame her). I made pumpkin ice cream with ginger snap cookies while I was there, and Andrew played chess with my nephew-ish people. Then we came home and watched Episode VI. Yay.

Last night I went out with my boys (friends from high school). We went to Intermezzo, which could probably be considered out regular hang out spot. Alcohol was consumed and conversation went...how do you say...scandalous? Well, it can't be helped, really. They're both guys in their early twenties, one's gay and the other one's just discovered the joys of...scandalous things just a few years ago. Anyways, things were said that just totally turned me off from boys. I told them that they were going to turn me asexual, and during one part of the conversation, I actually left, mostly because I had to pee, but it was still effective because when I came back, they were talking about music, which honestly wasn't a better topic (that's bad, isn't it? I mean, I am a musician afterall, and I should really like talking about music and all that, but to tell you the truth, I really need to be in the mood to talk about that stuff).

So I came to the conclusion that boys are gross.

Two days till school gets out! Yippeeeeee!

The past couple days have been strange...a little out of the ordinary. I'm not sure if it's because Thanksgiving break's coming up or the half days we had this week, but something's a little off. I've been feeling weird and thinking about things that I don't normally think about. Hmm.

Today I had to break up a fight between two boys who are taller and bigger than I am. That was...interesting. Actually, it scared the crap out of me. I had to physically get in there and break them up. And earlier that morning, I had to prevent a fight between two girls from happening. During my last class, I found out that one of my students got into a fight. What's with all the kids fighting today?? It's like they all said, "Hm...let's pick a day to be violent. How about the 17th? Yeah, that seems like a good day for picking fights."

Sometimes you just don't know what people are thinking. I almost wish that people were just really blunt all the time so you know exactly what they're thinking or thinking about. Would life be easier or harder? I can definitely see the benefits, but it would probably cause a lot of problems too. Relationships probably wouldn't last very long, there would be more fights...but what if things were always just like that, and people learned to deal with it? Would the world be a better place?

Maybe it's not that I want everyone to be blunt all the time. Maybe I just want to ask questions that would not normally be okay to ask and get an honest answer without the other person feeling uncomfortable or weird about it. Ah, well...I probably wouldn't get the answer that want anyway. That's just how my life is.

It's a pity I don't blog that much anymore. I was reading what I wrote a couple Thanksgivings ago, and man...I was reeeal angry about something (hmm...family, perhaps? The holidays seem to bring out the worst in family). I honestly don't think that i'm going to have anything to be angry about this year. I have my own place, a good job, a rediscovery of my faith, great new and old friends...I've got it pretty good, if I think about it. Of course, tomorrow when I have my 7th graders, I'm sure i'll be thinking otherwise. Dang chilrens...

For those of you who know me, you know how much I love to cook and even more, eat. And you also know that come Thanksgiving every year, I FREAK OUT. So, after careful consideration, here's what I'll be cookin' up next Thursday.

*Thanksgiving Menu*

- honey brined and glazed roast turkey
- green bean casserole with fried shallots
- mashed bourbon sweet potato
- four cheese and macaroni
- corn on the cob
- garlic mashed potato
- brussel sprouts and chestnuts
- creamed spinach
- pumpkin bread pudding
- apple pie
- sweet potato souffle

Why do I feel like I'm old? It's Saturday night. I'm 24 years old. I should be out partying, bar hopping, doing something that most 20-somethings do on Saturday nights. But nooo...I'm at my parents' house...blogging...about being a loser. I've come to the conclusion that my life is turning into something very, very boring. I should really live life right now, ya know? We spend our early twenties trying to establish ourselves and save up money so that we have a secure future, but when we actually have the money and time to do stuff, we can't physically do half the stuff that we want to do because we're old. That's sooo messed up. I think I need to make a "Stuff I need to do before I get too old and wrinkly" list. Most people have lists like that, right? Hmm....

Stuff I Need To Do Before I Get Too Old and Wrinkly

1) learn to ride a motorcycle (and hopefully buy one so I can show off my motorcycle riding skills)
2) go to culinary school of some sort
3) learn a martial art form
4) have a night of drunken debauchery and have someone take care of everything that goes along with such an evening
5) go on a road trip over an entire summer
6) attend a food and wine festival in Montreal
7) live in NYC
8) learn how to salsa
9) go to the symphony every other weekend
10) ...um...have wild, crazy sex with a total stranger (must be HOT...and have a hot car) without feeling guilty? (hehehehe...)

I think numbers 1, 3 and 8 are probably the most feasible. Eh...I'll through all of them somehow, right?

Here are a couple things that has happened or is going on right now:

1) I went to NYC. It was GREAT. I can totally see myself living there. I met really neat people, saw really neat things and ate WAY too much food (that's a good thing). One bad thing...never fly AirTran and NEVER fly into LaGuardia.
2) I went to Boston. That was fun, too...but not as fun as NYC. It was mostly chill. I hung out with Eric and his sister, James and Bryan. We saw fireworks, had a little cookout for the 4th...it was nice and relaxing. Oh, we did got to Little Italy and eat dinner, but the food wasn't as great as the Little Italy in New York. Man...the food in NY was amazing.
3) Eric took me to Portland, Maine for a day. It was absolutely gorgeous up there. The weather was 75 degrees and sunny with little fluffy clouds here and there, the water was clear, the waves crashing against the rocks, the lighthouse, the little town, fishing boats, sail boats...it was perfect. I really did not want to leave. It's funny because the two places that I was most impressed with was the big city and the little town. I can see myself living in either of those places.
4) I'm moving out! This Saturday. So if you have a truck, come on by. I'll...make you avacado ice cream :)
5) Coco (my cat) got her first shots yesterday. She's all feverish and sad looking. She's been sleeping a lot. They told me this would happen, but I didn't think I'd be depressed too. Man, I really hate seeing her like this. This sucks.

This morning I had to take my sister to work. I decided to turn on the GTech radio station. It was the jazz program. Now for those of you who have never heard the Tech station, they known to play some very...abstract things. I remember when Miles was the host of the classical hour, he played some things that you don't hear about unless you're studying it in a theory class. How did the hear about this stuff? I have no idea. Anyways, so we were listening to jazz, and it was a bit like acid jazz. Gloria didn't say anything for a few minutes, but about half way to work she decided to give her opinion. Here's how the conversation went:

"Unnee, what is this? It sounds like a bunch of people practicing at the same time before a concert."
"It's jazz, Gloria."
"Uh, no. It's not. I like jazz. If I heard this played live at a coffee shop, I'd leave."
"Hehe...does it make you angry?"
"Uh, yes. I doesn't sound right."
"Hehehehe..."

It's been fun exposing her to new music. You should've seen her when we were listening to Shostakovich quartets :) hehehe...

It's been awhile since the last time I blogged here, so here are the highlights of the past couple weeks:

1) My sister got her eyelids done. Now, for those of you who are...well, white, you're probably wondering what the hell I'm talking about. For whatever reason, Asian people decided awhile back that they'd like to look like you white folks. So the most obvious thing to start with was our squinty little eyes. That's right, they made up a "surgery" where they make Asian eyes look bigger. Here's what they do. They cut the eyelid, tracing around the top of the eyeball, pull fat out of the eyelid (apparently, the reason why Asians don't have the little creases is because our eyes are fat), stitch up and voila! Bigger eyes.
Anyways, my sister got this done last week, and it was kinda funny at first because she was all swollen in the eyes and shit, but now, it's been a week and the swelling hasn't gone down yet, and it makes her look not Korean. It's kinda making her look Vietnamese. I told her that we'd have to change her name of Thuy Ngyuen. I really, super duper hope that it turns out good for her sake.
2) I was a counselor at the ASTA Music Camp for a couple days. It was fun, right up until the second to last day. Here's the background story: The camp has three sessions, and I was there for the second one. During the first session, this poor little 4th grader got this really nasty stomach virus that made him throw up all over the place. Unfortunately, the boy's roommate also got it, and then on the day that I arrived at the camp, the counselor across the hall from the boys got it. And then the second day I was there, the counselor that was in the cello auditions with the counselor who got sick also got it, and then finally, I got it. It was absolutely unavoidable. I was destined to get sick, and it was the sickest I have ever been in my entire life. The virus kept me up all night with violent vomitting and...well, other things. And when I didn't have anymore to throw up, it showed no mercy. I just kept throwing up the water that I was drinking, and then finally when I stopped drinking the water, I was just reching over the toilet. Needless to say, the toilet and I became REAL tight after that night. Ehhh...just thinking about it makes me want to throw up. Yuck.

There ya go. The story of my life. Oh, now I'm in NC visiting Dena. Yay for a summer with pay and no work!

8. See the hotdog eating contest at Coney Island, but since I won't be in NY for the 4th of July, I guess making Vicki eat as many hotdogs as he can while we're there will suffice. I too will have a hotdog.
9. Eat Peking duck at China Town.

If you have any suggestions, please feel free to comment.

Things I want to do in NYC:

1) Frozen hot chocolate at Serendipity 3
2) eat a big ass pastrami sandwich at Carnegie Deli
3) go to a Conan O'Brian taping
4) have a picnic at Central Park
5) eat at a fancy restaurant, but for half the price because it'll be Restaurant Week while I'm there! Yipee!
6) go to Time Square and meet the naked cowboy (or at least I think he's there...)
7) go to a concert at Lincoln Center...hey, maybe I'll get to see Riza's boyfriend play

Hmm...so my list so far has a lot to do with eating. Oh well, that's what I like to do.

Yesterday, we went out for Dorothy's birthday. She wanted to go to the Vortex, so that's where we went. We all had burgers (well, not all of us...Tiff substituted with chicken), and they were good. It was nice to go downtown. I forget how much I like being down there sometimes. I wish I lived closer to the city. Anyways, after dinner, we went to Apres Diem for dessert and coffee. I forgot how much I like that place, too. Sigh...there's nothing to do around here. But it's gonna get super bad next year when I have to move to Lawrenceville. Booo...

It was good getting together with everyone. We always have a good time together. It's just too bad that we don't get to do it often. Life gets in the way of things.

Andrew and I had an interesting conversation about "growing up" on the drive home last night. Basically, we're grateful that we're teachers and we get summer breaks, spring breaks, winter breaks and holidays. All of our friends have to work right through all those things. I think it really hit us when we were talking to everyone about maybe doing a beach trip or something like that, and Tiff said, "We're taking all of our vacation days on our trip to Germany, so we don't have any days left." Apparently in the "real world," you only get 2 weeks of vacation time or something like that. That's crazy compared to what we have. And we get paid through the breaks. Man...I'm really glad that I decided to become a teacher. And for those of you who have "real jobs," I don't know how you can do it. I just hope you really, really like your jobs.

Lefse: a traditional flatbread made from potato and flour

When we were in Minnesota, I made a big deal about experiencing true Minnesotan foods. That's when Bob told us this story about lutefisk. He said that one of his friend's family was talking about getting together for something and making lutefisk at the grandmother's house. When the grandmother was told about this, she said something like this: "I don't want you to cook lutefisk at my house! I don't want my house to smell like p---y!" (you can guess what that last word is) Well, after that story, I was intrigued to find out more about this lutefisk, so I looked it up in my friendly neighborhood Minnesota cookbook. It didn't have a recipe for it, but here's what it said:

"Two weeks before Christmas, tranditional Scandinavian households begin the preparatioin of the codfish for 'lutefisk.' Washtubs become lutefisk tubs in which to soak the dried stacks of cod for a week. In the 'luting' process, a lye solution of citical strength is used: too weak and the fish is tough; too strong and it disappears during cooking. It takes another week of soaking to get the lye out, and then the product is simmered gently over heat until flaky and tender. *pay attention, this is the important part* Often the men stay away from home during this prearation process because of the PUNGEN AROMA. But the final presentataion of the lutefisk with its complementary dishes of fruit soup and lefse (what the hell is that?) always brings them back."
- From Minnesota...More than a Cookbook

More than a cookbook, indeed. Thanks, Laurie and Debra Gluesing, for educating us with this enlightening information about the lutefisk.

With Mother's Day approaching, I thought I'd write about the last 24 hours with my mother.

Yesterday morning:
Our church was supposed to go on a picnic at this park in Suwanee. It started raining, and it didn't look like it was going to stop, so my dad called all the families to tell them that we couldn't go to the park, we'd have the service at the church. Of course, people asked what we're going to do with the food that they've prepared. My dad didn't have an answer to that yet, but he said that they'd discuss it after service. Well, after a few minutes of calling everyone, he headed downstairs to the kitchen and started cleaning stuff. He was going to tell everyone to come over to our house for the "picnic." My mother had a FIT. She started bitching and whining about how she didn't want people to come over because the house wasn't clean enough, they'll say stuff about how the house is always dirty and she didn't want to hear it, blah, blah, blah. If this was the first time for her to say this kinda thing, I don't think I would've thought anything of it, but it's EVERY TIME that we have people come over that she bitches about the SAME THINGS. Is she EVER gonna get over it? And as the preacher's wife, she's gonna have to at some point get used to the fact that people are going to come over. ARGH.

This morning:
On the way out to take my mom to work, my dad asked me if I could pick up my mom from work because he wants to go to a revival tonight. My mom heard this and started saying things like, "No, then I'm going to take the car! I don't like having those people see how I don't have a car anyway! I'm taking the car!" This meant two things: 1) The car would be parked all day in a parking lot on BUFORD HWY...not exactly the safest place on earth. 2) My dad would not be able to leave the house at all.

After we finally convinced her of letting my dad take her to work, she proceeded to get on my case about how she asked me to write out a couple recipes for her co-worker's daughter, that I was in the process of doing, but was not going to finish doing by the time she had to leave. She just kept going on and on and on about how she asked me to do it DAYS ago, and I was waiting till the last minute, all I had to do was type them up really fast, blah, blah, blah. It really isn't even that important. ARGH.

I feel like all she does is bitch and complain about things. It worries me because I can barely handle it now...it's just gonna get worse once she's older. And I'm afraid that I'm going down that path. Victor likes to joke that I complain and bitch a lot, but I know he's not joking. It's for real...and it'll probably get worse in the future. Is it inevitable? Will I become my mother when I "grow up?" Will someone please just give me a pill that'll stop this madness?

Recently, Andrew and I made a trip up to Minneapolis, Minnesota for John Samuel's recital. Here's what happened:

Day 1:
We arrived at the airport around 9pm. It was COLD and WET. Unfortunately, I was not prepared for this at all. For the entire weekend, I brought a pair of loafers and two sandal-like things. NO SOCKS, and damnit, my toes were about to fall off. Anyways, we had a very warm welcoming party waiting for us (Bob, Bob Sr., Bobbett and Aunt Nancy). We had a lovely tour of the Minneapolis airport parking lot, then we got in the car and went to Bob's house where we met his roommate, Paul, and went to Chicago's for dinner, which we walked to and from....in the rain and cold...with no socks on. Anyways, after that we pretty much crashed for the evening because we're old. Paul was nice enough to let us stay in his room during our time there.

Day 2:
We went out for lunch, pretty much as soon as we woke up. Bob's peeps met us at the apartment, and we drove to a mall and ate hippie pizza at California Pizza Kitchen. We walked around for awhile, then we had to head back because Bob had to get ready for the recital. The recital was awesome, of course. I wanted to take some pictures of Bob playing, and being a musician myself, I turned the flash off the camera before taking the picture. Unfortunately, he was moving around a little too much, so I had to change the setting on the camera. Being the idiot that I am, I didn't turn the flash off that setting, and I took a damn picture...and it flashed. I was SOOOOOOO embarrassed. I wanted to shot myself in the foot so I could draw the attention away from the fact that I took a picture and it flashed. Apparently, it really messed up the pianist and Bob. I'm a terrible person and I should have my eyes taken out for that. ARGH.
Even after that fiasco, he did a fantastic job. Afterwards, we went to Chino Latino. I was excited because Rachel Ray went there when she was in Minneapolis for Tasty Travels. It was neat. The atmosphere was very chic and the food was good. The drinks were a little expensive, but they were gooood. Andrew and I got this one drink that comes in a pineapple. I wanted to take the pineapple home, but I decided against it.
After the after-party, Bob's friends came over and we played Cranium. Andrew and I won.

Day 3:
Bob's parents and aunt came over, and we all went to The Mall of America. It's freakin' HUGE. Every single store every created on Earth was in that mall, plus a dinosaur museum, water park, amusement park and an enormous Legos thingie. But the most exciting part of it was H&M...no, actually, we went to an oxygen bar. It was pretty funny because they make you lay in these massage chairs with earphones on your head and tubes stuck up your nose. Apparently, it's like 98% pure oxygen, and it's really super good for you. After about 15-20 minutes of the chair, you sit up at the actual "bar" and breath in some more pure oxygen, take a shot of really nasty energy drink, and have the nice lady rub your shoulders and back with this nifty massage thing. After the whole thing, you pay the lady $20 and walk out with a slight buzz and grinning like an idiot. It was very interesting.
After that, we had to say goodbye to Aunt Nancy because she had a flight that evening. They (Bob's family) headed out, and we just kinda walked around the mall. I wish we could've had more time, but there was waaaaay too much to see in the short amount of time that we had. We're just gonna have to go back sometime.
That night, people (Bob's friends and parents) came over and we played cards for a long time. We ate lots of junkfood that we bought from Lund's (I think that's what it's called). It kinda reminded me of the Freshmarket and Harry's...and I guess Whole Foods. Anyways, it was a nice grocery store.

Day 4:
Our last day. We packed up, drove around the city, a lake near Bob's, St. Paul, and finally stopped at this Thai place to lunch. I had red curry for the first time. It was really good, except I got a little worried about having curry before getting on an airplane. It was funny because when our food came out, Andrew's plate looked like someone just threw up on it, and I got worried because I knew he wouldn't eat it, and if he did, he wouldn't like it. Fortunately, they got the order mixed up, and wasn't his food. The stuff that he ordered looked much better, and he ate the whole thing.
Oh, the sun finally decided to come out the last day we were there.

And that's about it. There are pictures on my facebook page if you're interested. And if this summary of the trip seems boring, I just want to let you know that the actual trip was a lot more fun. The End.

I found out not too long ago that a friend and fiancee broke up after nearly 8 years of being together. It was over something stupid...or so it seems. I think there's probably something that's not being said, but that's just my opinion. Anyways, that kinda made me think...what if something like that happens to Andrew and me? Hopefully it's not over something stupid, but what if after like, 9 years of being together, all of a sudden, it's all gone? Would I feel like I wasted my time on something that never became anything significant?

On the Bert Show the other morning, they were discussing the amount of time it takes to get over a relationship. This woman called in and said that it takes half the time of the relationship to completely get over that person. Well, for my friend's sake, I hope that's not true. I don't wish 4 years of misery on anyone, especially a friend.

My sister is in love with this FOB. She told me that she's decided that she's not going to get married unless she marries him. I said, "You won't be able to survive with an FOB." For whatever reason, that really, REALLY upset her, and she started screaming at me saying, "I think it's really sad that you got together with Andrew because you didn't even like him at first and you probably got together with him because you can't get anyone else!" Isn't she the nicest fucking sister ever? I can't WAIT till she's out of my life.

Life has been very uneventful. Work, work, work...bored, bored, bored. Is this what the rest of my life is going to be like? Troy keeps saying that I'm going to hit 25 and start my "nesting" phase. Apparently, that's when you start wanting to settle down and have kids and all that shit. I dunno if I'm never gonna hit that...it sounds too serious and permanent.

Yesterday, we had the surprise party for Tiffany. It wasn't exactly what I wanted it to be, but whatever, it was fun anyway. I tried to make it a Harry Potter themed party, but the only thing Harry Potter about it was the movie, which was her birthday present, and the Bertie Bott's Every Flavored Jelly Beans. We played the "Guess that Bean" game...hehehe...it was funny, espeically when Andrew got the Rotten Egg flavor, and Derrick kept eating every bean we gave him.

It's Spring Break!! I honestly never thought it would ever be...I'm sooo excited about not being forced to see 'Flat and Wide' for a week :) That really puts a smile on my face.

I made these little chick cupcakes for a couple people at school today. It's funny because the guys really don't give a crap about whether they're cute or not. When I give them to women, they're usually like, "Awww! They're too cute to eat!" Today, three of the four people that I gave them to were men. One said, "I don't care it's they're cute, I'll eat it." Another opened it up, looked at it and said, "Thanks Grace, this is really sweet" and pulled the legs off and ate them. Well, that's the last time I try to make something cute for guys. They just want food.

I'm so freakin' bloated today. If you put me in the middle of a large body of water, I would float really well. Could someone come over and deflate me or....bring me a chocolate cake?

Should I cut my hair? I was gonna wait to cut so I can have enough hair to donate to Locks of Love, but I'm getting really, REALLY sick of it being so freakin' long. It's too much.

I have a job for next year...YAAAAY! Unfortunately, I'm gonna have to move to Lawrenceville. But since everyone else seems to be headed in that direction, maybe it won't be so bad. Tiff, you need to find a house in Lawrenceville so we can be neighbors!
We need to go celebrate...anyone up for celebrating?

I found out yesterday that a really funny comedian named Mitch Hedberg is dead. He ODed on heroine or something. Booo...I really wanted to see him live. He's so damn funny.

I was reading Dorothy's livejournal, and I found this survey. I like it...it has to do with food.


For your inner cook:

How many meals does your family eat at home a week? A lot. Especially when I'm in the cooking mood. I like to cook at home as much as possible because I feel like anything I can buy at a restaurant, I can make at home, and ten times better. Plus it's cheaper to eat at home.

How many cookbooks do you own? I have about 5 or 6, but I subscribe to Gourmet and buy whatever other interesting magazines I might find

How often do you refer to a cookbook each week? Almost every single time I cook, unless I know the recipe by heart or I'm making something up. Like today, I made a margherita pizza, and I didn't use a recipe. But Italian food's kinda easy.

Do you collect recipes from other sources? online, tv, people

How do you store those recipes? most of the time, I attach urgent recipes (like things I HAVE to try ASAP) or recipes that I really, really like on the refrigerator.

Is there a particular ethnic style or flavor that predominates in your cooking? ...herbs?

What is your favorite kitchen task related to meal planning or preparation? tasting :)

Do you plan menus before you shop? Uh, duh. What would be the point of going shopping if you don't know what you have to get? Although, I do forget things sometimes...that's why I make lists.

What are your three favorite kitchen tools or appliances? spatula, Silpat, large cutting board. And if I had a Kitchen Aid stand mixer, that would be at #1.

If you could buy one new thing for your kitchen, money was no object, and space not an issue, what would you like to have? Please see above answer.

Do you have a seperate freezer for storage? No, but we do have two refrigerators.

How many meatless main dish meals do you fix in a week? Most of the time, I try to have something with protein in it...but I made meatless pizza twice this week.

If you have a decorating theme in your kitchen, what is it? Hmm...I don't have a style right now, but I would like to have a kitchen that is spacious with lots of storage, stainless steel appliances for the major things (fridge, sinks, ovens, stove), and fire engine red small appliances (toaster, stand mixer, coffee maker, etc), a brick fire oven, indoor grill...okay, let me stop. I could go on forever.

What was the first thing you learned to cook, and how old were you? Hmm...well, when I was in 5th grade, I took a week long cooking workshop, and I learned how to make some really good food. I think the first time I cooked a full meal by myself was a couple weeks after the classes. One of my teachers and her children came over the dinner, and I made manicotti and strawberry cheesecake for dessert.

How did you learn to cook? watching people, tv, reading, tasting


Hey, that was fun. I liked those questions.

There are things about me that I really, really hate. And you'd think that since I'm aware of these things, I'd fix them, but I don't. It's like I can't help it. I just hate myself afterwards, and this whole Asian pride thing gets in the way of me apoloizing. I've actually been trying to fix the apologizing part, but it really hasn't been working too well, because most of the time it involves my sister and parents. They don't do the whole "forgiving" thing too well. They just take the apology and "move on," but as soon as you do something that they don't like, they throw it in your face (it's more my sister and mother more than my dad...poor Dad). For that reason, the communication in this household doesn't really...well, exist. We never really talk to each other about serious stuff because the other person's always rolling their eyes, and they feel like the ony reason why that person's telling them anything is because they want pity and they want you to do something about their problems...or at least that's how I feel. And I really, really hate myself for feeling that way. I wish I could just have sympathy for them and be grateful that I can help out. Instead, I feel really...I dunno...I feel like they're taking something away from me, holding me back, and it sucks. I feel like I'm going to live the rest of my life taking care of my familiy, and I should feel good about the fact that I can, but at the same time, it's a huge burden, ya know? I wish I could be more thankful and look at the bright side of things, rather than get all stressed out and depressed. I feel completely self centered and selfish when I think this way...arrrgh.

On an unrelated note, St. Patrick's Day was yesterday. Ross, Tiff, John, Dorothy, Mike, Amanda, Andrew and I went to this bar called "Spotted Dog." It's a nice place. We just sat around, drinking over priced drinks, eating over priced food. At one point during the evening, Tiffany, Dorothy, Amanda, Ross and I all needed to go to the restroom. Here are a couple things that were observed on the way to and in the bathroom:

1. The bathroom was too far from the bar/restaurant. It was upstairs, around a corner, around another corner and down the hall. If someone got sick from drinking and neede to barf, they would not make it to the bathroom.
2. There was a man in the bathroom. I don't think he was gay, nor was he a transvestite.
3. There were girls in there who were showing off their crotches and asses.
4. They proceeded to ask people if they wanted to see their nipples (I think the guy who was in there wanted to see them).
5. Ross, while waiting for us in the hallway, was accosted by the same girl that was showing us her ass. But like a good Catholic boy, he refused the nipples.
6. I had a Jager bomb with John (no, not in the bathroom or on the way to the bathroom...after we got back. I just thought it would be a nice ending to the list.

Last night, on MySpace, I wrote about the way society expects women to look. This morning, I was listening to the radio, and they had the "guy panel," and they were answering questions from women who called the show. There were a few questions that were a little stupid, but one question was very interesting. She asked, "Would you rather an overweight woman who is confident in herself or a woman with an amazing body that has no confidence?" Guess what the guys said, "How overweight?" I suppose that question make sense to ask, but at the same time, it seems like they were asking to avoid sounding like complete jackasses. What really made them sound like jackasses was when one of the women on the show asked, "Let's say that you've found the perfect girl, but she's a little overweight...like 5 pounds. What's the deal breaker for you? How much weight would she have to put on before you break up with her?" Okay, first of all, you don't notice 5 pounds. Second, one of the guys said, "20 pounds." Goodness...he would throw away the perfect girl because of a little weight. I mean, of course, no guy is going to want a fat girlfriend, but aren't they always saying how confidence is what makes a woman sexy? In fact, later in the show, they were asked what makes one woman better in bed than another? And they said, "Confidence." Oy...I can't decide if I appreciate them for their honesty or if they're just the type of guys that women should avoid.

I guess since I had a good day yesterday, I'm doomed to have a bad one today. I've been in a bad mood since I woke up this morning. I don't understand what's wrong...well, I guess I know what's wrong. It's just something that's been a problem for the past few years, and it's something that's never going to away. It's because of a stupid mistake that my parents made a few years ago. It's because of the mistakes that they're making now. It's because they don't know how to take care of themselves without me holding their hand. I know I've probably written about this more times than anything else on this blog, and it doesn't seem like it should be something new, but I feel like everytime they ask me to do something that's totally unfair to me, it's another brick on my shoulders, and it's becoming unbarable. Sometimes I really have to wonder why we have to go through this. And I want to be the stronger person and say, "well, it's life experience" or "what doesn't kill me makes me stronger" or "at least I'm able to help," but how much longer can I take it before I completely lose it? Will I lose it?

Notes to myself, inspired by Bob...

1. Don't let things that are "wide and flat" get in the way of...things.
2. Scratch ass when it itches
3. Bake at least once a week
4. Listen to more Brahms
5. Cut toenails...them junks are NASTAY
6. Take more pictures with digital camera
7. Watch more Daily Show
8. Knit
9. Scare more chilrrens at school
10. Write more in my blog

I got this from Natascha today. Honestly, I haven't done one of these in a very long time...I think the last time I did one was freshman year in college. Ya know, on one of those nights when you know you should be doing theory homework, but you don't know what the hell Pomeroy was talking about that day, so you make yourself feel better by sitting at your desk with the book open in front of you, pretending to read, but you're reading in circles because you're really talking on IM and filling out an email survey. Yeah...one of those.


1. What time did you get up this morning? 7:45
2. Diamonds or pearls? ...okay, nevermind. I give up. I don't know how or why I filled out so many of these damn things in college. I mean, nobody really cares about you THAT much to read all of it. You know those bitches take one look at the subject of the email and throw that shit away. Oh well...there's my attempt at recreating my youth.

Andrew and I had a very interesting conversation the other night. I'm not sure how the conversation started, but he said, "If we ever broke up, I don't think I would date another Asian girl...too much family drama. It's okay with your family because we've been together for so long and I know them and all, but I don't think I could go through it again. Would you date a Korean guy?" And I said, "...yeah, probably...just to see what it's like." Then he said, "Well, that would make your dad very happy."

I guess it's good that we can have a conversation like that without it ending in tragedy, but still. I felt a wee bit weird after that conversation. I know my family is really dysfunctional, but is it THAT bad? Okay, nevermind...it's that bad.

PS: He'll not only be Korean, but he'll be a Korean that plays cello. And he'll play for me every night, damnit.

Where has the time gone? I can't believe I'm already 24. Next year, I'll be 25. As Andrew so lovingly put it the other day, I'll "be a quarter of a century old!" I honestly don't feel that old. It's like someone snapped their fingers and time shifted to 10 years later. I don't feel like all that time's passed at all, but if I think back, I do have a lot of memories.
I just found out that ANOTHER friend of mine from high school is getting married. That's like, 12 people in the past two years who've either gotten married or engaged. Everything is changing, and it's unreal. I don't like it, and I demand that it stop right now, damnit.

I just had an incredible, eye-opening experience.
I went to the grocery store to buy some unsalted butter for the pound cake that I was going to make (plans were interrupted, unfortunately, by my mother who said it wasn't needed anymore, which is just wrong because Nonnie's (Andrew's grandmother) pound cake is a necessity in everyday life if you ask me), and I passed by the deli, and saw that they had fresh tortellini. I decided to buy some for lunch. Beside the pasta, they had different sauces: marinara, alfredo, regular tomato and pesto. Ah, yes...pesto...my enemy since my early days in college. I tried it once at Eat's, and NEVER AGAIN. It was the worst thing I had ever tasted, EVER. Just looking at it made me feel sick. It looked and tasted like...well, ass. Vomit. Whatever's disgusting to you.

Anyways, I've been trying to be a little bit more open minded about food lately, especially since I was completely wrong about fish tacos and pho (yes, there was a time when I hate pho...blasphemy, I know), so I decided to get the pesto...and alfredo as a back up. I couldn't look at it for too long, so I just threw it into my basket and ignored it until I got home.
At home, I got the pasta ready and put spoons in the little containers that had the sauces. I spooned a little pesto over my perfect little tortellini. I sniffed it...and it didn't smell like ass. So I licked my fork...and it didn't taste like ass. So I ate a tortellini that was half covered in the pesto and BAM! It was GOOOOOOD. So many flavors bursting in my mouth...it was awesome.

So there ya go. My pesto experience. Go get some right now. It's REALLY good.

Currently, I am in the middle of trying to find a job for next year...and it's not an easy task. Too many decisions (whew...took me a while to remember how to spell that) to make...and I guess I'm not too good that doing that. There are a lot of people going through that right now, though. There's a teacher at my school that's going through a similar situation, except not really. She's like this world-class athlete, and she might be chosen to be a part of the US team for an international competition, but if she is chosen, she'll have to be out of school for a month, and the principal won't allow that. So now she has to make this decision (didn't take as long this time) of what she wants. Yeah, my decisions (yay! got it right the first time!) aren't quite so...life changing, I guess.

Weddings have been swimming around my head in the past couple days. I think it's fairly ridiculous that people spend so much damn money on one day. I just wanna take them by the shoulders and shake them really hard saying, "WHAT ABOUT THE REST OF YOUR LIVES??"

I'm soooo excited about the weekend. It's nice and rainy outside, and I'm going to savor every single minute of it.

I read Vicki's entry about Valentine's day, and I've been thinking...I think I should be the female version of "Hitch." It wouldn't be bad to get paid for things like that.

Victor, stop lying to your girlfriend...never a romantic?? Puh-leeze...you've got more girly genes than I do.

Yesterday was Valentine's Day. Yes, an extremely overrated holiday that was made up by chocolatiers, florists and Hallmark. Who is Valentine anyway? Oh well...Andrew and I celebrate every year anyway. It's just a nice way to spend some quality time together, ya know?

So I made dinner, which was absolutely fabulous, and we watched a movie. The movie, not so fabulous. We watched Must Love Dogs. And I thought one can never go wrong with a John Cusack movie, but I was wrong. He was as good as he could be with the crappy script that he had. And Diane Lane was MUCH better in Unfaithful. Overall, not a good movie. Don't watch it.

Mmm...fish tacos...

Last night, I had pho with Barbara (by the way, Gloria just found out last night, after YEARS of eating pho that it's not pronounced "pho" with a long "o" but "phuh"...she's so damn special). We were talking about this and that, and somehow the topic of Asian boys came up. She brought up an interesting point. She said that most Korean boys are jerks to their girls. I really wanted to defend the Korean male population, but I couldn't come up with anything. I think what she said is true. Most Korean men I know are grown ups with kids and wives, and they're old and FOB. Old, FOBs definitely don't treat their women the way they should (or the way I think they should). They still have this mentality of men being more superior, women need to stay at home and make him some rice, blah, blah, blah...it's rather backwards if you ask me. And the other (younger) Korean guys I know kinda come off as jerks, too. So I've come to the conclusion that yes, Korean guys are jerks. I don't think they can help it. It's probably just...I dunno...in their blood? Whatever. I'm not dating one.

On a side note, my student wouldn't open the door to her house last night because she thought I was an Indian man. I mean, really...do I look like Naveen??

Okay, so let me explain the happening of the past couple days.

1. My sister auditioned for this Korean style American Idol on Friday evening. It was sponsored by KTN (Korean Television Network), which is located in Duluth. They have their own station and everything, which we have (Comcast, 390).
Anyways, she was one of 70 that auditioned, and one of 23 that made it through to the final round. The concert was...okay. I mean, there were some really good singers and everything, but the concert as a whole was entirely too long and the MC SUCKED. Gloria sang very well. She was super nervous because she was singing a Korean song, and she was afraid that she would forget the words, but she didn't forget the words. After she sang, the MC said that she was born in the US, and she can speak, read and write Korean. My mom and I looked at each other and just about laughed out loud. Gloria? Read and write Korean? Riiight...
After 3.5 hours of torture, the concert finally ended, and they announced the final 6, then the final 2, then the winner. It was pretty stupid. The girl that won didn't even sing all that well. In fact, while she was singing, I didn't think that she would place. It's like the judges don't know what real talent sounds like. Either way, Gloria didn't place, but she did sing very well. I'm glad she entered because I think it gave her more confidence to enter more contests, and it also made her realize the things that she needs to work on (like, learning how to speak Korean properly).

2. SUPERBOWL!! Richard had a party. It was fun. I ate way too much. The Seahawks didn't win...but I thought the Steelers deserved it. They had some very interesting plays. The refs REALLY didn't want the Seahawks to win. Maybe Matt Hassleback's baldness offended them or something.

Dear Paula,

Please ignore my friends, especially the one called Bob. He didn't mean that about your chicken.

TRIPLE love,
Grace

PS: The one called Victor is super Asian and he thinks he's the tallest Asian but he's not.

This past weekend, we had our annual trip down to Savannah for the GMEA Conference. Man...it sure was a good time :) We tried to go to Paula Deen's restaurant again (The Lady and Sons') but once again, we did not make it in. There was a two hour wait, and we had a seminar to attend. So I'm thinking about writing her a letter. It'll be something like this:

Dear Paula Deen,

My name is Grace. I've been trying to eat at your restaurant the past 5 times I've been to Savannah, and I have yet to walk through the front door because of the wait. This is terribly upsetting because I am a big fan of your show, and I would like to try your food. Please come to my house and cook for me.

Love, Grace

PS: It would be great if you could cook something that didn't involve so much butter. My dad has high blood pressure and my sister thinks that she needs to have her gall bladder removed.

So yesterday, I had the day off because I worked extra hours last week, and it just happened to be my birthday. I didn't do much all day. I sat around watched a couple episodes of West Wing, continued knitting the scarf, un-did the whole thing, started knitting it again, went to teach...I was expecting a very quiet day. The only thing that was going to happen was Andrew coming over to make fish tacos for dinner. Well, he came over, and we started cooking when the doorbell rang. I was like, "Who the hell is that?" Guess who! EVERYBODY (almost). There they were, Chelsea, Dorothy, John, Tiff and Ross, standing in the rain. And there I was, standing at the door in my pink pjs with pink bears and pink slippers, trying to decide whether I should open the door or not. But I did because they started complaining about the rain.

Anyways, it was a lovely evening with tacos and brownies and cheesy bread and American Idol. Oh...and a digital camera. Yes, I finally have one now, so I can't bitch about it any more. But that's okay...I have plenty of other things to bitch about.

By the way, Andrew, if you ever get around to reading this (or my blog in general), I want you to know that I love you very, very much and you're the best boyfriend anyone could ever ask for. Thanks for everything :)

Another year, another birthday. You know, I used to be really into my birthday. For as long as I could remember, I'd have big get togethers and really have a good time with friends and good food. It was all about having a good time. But now...life is too real and depressing. I mean, what's the point? Here I am, 24 years old, still living at home (not by choice), not making that much money but I have a family to support, a sister that's the biggest self-absorbed, disrespectful, unappreciative bitch....anyways, yeah. So if you're ever wondering why I'm such an angry bitch, THAT'S WHY.

Other things I want for my birthday that I just thought up:

1) cake decorating kit
2) terry cloth robe
3) salt and pepper mill

Things I want for my birthday:

1. An herb garden
2. A little stereo thingie for my kitchen (the kind that hangs from the cabinets)
3. Someone to come clean out my closet
4. Digital camera

I was looking at a Korean friend's MySpace the other day, and I noticed that almost all his friends are Korean girls. It's kinda sad how these girls like to take pictures of themselves in a way that makes them look...well, not like themselves. They always try to hide their face with their hair (which is dyed lighter and straighten, by the way) and have a "surprised" look on their face because they're trying to make their eyes look bigger. Of course, Asian guys really don't give a crap that stuff. Stupid society.

Anyways, I just got back from All-State auditions in Lovejoy. HEEHAW.

I feel like the more I live life, the more I find out how much this world and the people in it suck and I feel helpless in making it less sucky. What is the point? What can I do to make things better?...probably nothing. Maybe I could ask God for super powers like Superman so I can save the world from evil things.

Victor just called me to tell me about a conversation that he had with one of his Muslim friends. As far as he knows, she's a pretty hardcore about her faith and all that. But apparently, she doesn't mind that her boyfriendish person is a Christian because Muslims and Christians ultimately believe in the same God.

Here's what I think about that. Yes, ultimately both religions do believe in the same God, but they're completely different religions. And if you really think about it, aren't all religions ultimately worshipping the same God? They might not call him or her "God," but most religions have one god that's all powerful, all knowing, the one that creates and distroys. Isn't that what our God is? That doesn't make Judaism, Islam, Buddhism, Christianity, Hindu the same things. In fact, there are sects within those religions that argue about different beliefs and rituals, and who's right or wrong.

I think Victor and I came to the conclusion that her point of view is very broad and general, and she probably just wants things to work out with her boyfriend. I dunno...when it comes to religion, there are just way too many things to generalize like that. I mean, Andrew and I have arguements about religion, and he's Catholic and I'm Lutheran! The two closest denominations in Christianity, and we still have differences to talk about. Oh well. I hope everything works out for them...religion or not.