So the "holiday season" will soon be over. I have mixed feelings about it. I guess for some reason I didn't really get "into the spirit" of things...well, except when I was reading Chicken Soup for the Soul: Christmas Treasury (it was a gift, thank you very much).

Anyways, yesterday was okay. I spent the day stress-free for the most part, NOT like Thanksgiving at all. I made four dishes: honey glazed ham (I made the glaze all on my own, without a recipe), rosemary potatoes, chocolate pie and chocolate cake. So I wasn't running around frantically, until my psycho mother came home and started calling me worthless again.

**Side story: The next destination for my student teaching is Norcross HS. It's about 30 minutes from my house, so I've been thinking about moving towards that direction. Once I told my parents about moving out, my mother pounced on me and said, "Well, if you move out, you have to take your sister with you. We don't want you in the house anyway." So last night when she came home, she got super psycho about cleaning the house and cooking. Well, at least that's what it started out as. Then it became, "What have you been doing all day, I bet you were watching tv all day, why didn't you clean like I told you to, you don't ever do anything to help out, you wanna move out, but with the money that you pay for rent you could help us, but you don't ever think about helping us out, blah, blah, blah." And then she went on to scream about how I get to do whatever I want, never putting my parents' needs into consideration. SIGH...yeah, that made me feel really good.

So after that episode, our guests came, and of course, she put on her fucking friendly face like nothing bad ever happens in our house. I FUCKING HATE IT WHEN SHE DOES THAT. ARRRRGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH....

On a brighter note, here's what I got for Christmas: a really cute purse from the GAP, a purse from GUESS that looks like it used to belong to a dominatrix, two cookbooks, some cool "rosemary and mint" scented stuff from AVEDA (I told Andrew that it's gonna make me smell like the potatoes in the oven), a sweater, Allure from Chanel (YAAAAAAAY!!!), the Chicken Soup for the Soul book, an ornament, a sewing board, candy...and I think that's it.

Anyways,

This whole Christmas thing is getting out of hand. I'm getting stressed for some reason. I really don't think I've ever been stressed during Christmas.

Anyways, I've been irritated all day long. It started yesterday, really, when the brakes started making weird noises. I bought the car six months ago! It's not supposed to be doing that! So today, the noises got even worse, and listening to it while I was driving put me in a really pissy mood. And then, I couldn't find the Christmas music book that I needed, and then my student kept fucking up the notes on the page during the lesson, and then I had to drive all the way out to Decatur to pick up my dad, so I had to listen to my car some more, and then my parents gave me a really hard time about me wanting to move out. ARRRGGHHH...why do they do that?? I mean, it's not like they'll never see me again or something. It's not like I'm walking out of their lives. Can't they see that I'm stuck with them forever??

Now I smell bad. GREAT.

Eric and I went food shopping in three different food stores today. And then we spent the rest of the day/evening making food. We made too much food and we have lots of left overs. Yay.

I think I'm psycho. If I am, I get it from my mother. But I think my sister got most of the psycho gene.

Couple things that I've been thinking about:

1. Why do girls have to try harder than guys? The other day was my last day at Mabry, and I made cookies and brownies for the kids. All the girls wanted the small cookies while the boys wanted the biggest ones. These are freakin' middle schoolers! Why do they care so much about body image? I'll tell you why - FREAKIN' BRITTANY SPEARS AND HER FAKE-ASS, BARBIE-LIKE, I DON'T EAT ANYTHING BUT LETTUCE AND TUNA BODY. *ahem*....as I was saying, that whole thing got me thinking about how f***ed up society is, and I feel very sorry for all those poor children who are being born into it.
And on top of that, you know what my mom said to me today? She said, "You know, you should really start wearing make-up. You're at that age now." Would she be saying anything like that to me if I were a boy? I mean, obviously most boys don't wear make-up, but you know what I mean. I don't think she'd give a damn.
So here's what I've decided. I'm not gonna wear make-up on a regular basis until Andrew does (and that's Andrew Parsons, not Andrew Kang, because Andrew Kang might actually start wearing make-up (hehe...I love you, gurl!)).

2. I really suck at decorating cookies.

3. I need a nose job.

4. I also need a boob job.

5. Damnit, I'm falling into that whole "body image" thing.

6. I'm stupid.

So I had a gig today, and I went to a high school orchestra concert tonight. A couple thoughts about the day's events:

1. Cello is hot. There's nothing hotter than a guy in a tux playing a cello. Well, of course he has to look like he knows what he's doing. He certainly wouldn't look hot if he looked like a damn chicken playing the cello. Either way, I've decided that a cellist is a necessity. I need one in my living room constantly, to play Bach for me whenever I want him to.

2. Why do boys in high school look like grown men? That's just wrong.

3. I'm really angry at my parents for not starting me on cello when I was eight. I think I'd make a decent cellist. Hmm...I wonder what life would be like if I had played cello instead of violin...

4. Andrew needs to learn how to play cello.

Well, that's about it. And Vicki...I don't think I'd EVER desire anything like that. EW.

I've been having super strange dreams lately...where do dreams come from?

So the other night, I bought this coat that I've been drooling over for the past year. I originally saw it at Banana Republic, but I bought this one at Macy's, it's Reaction by Kenneth Cole. I got it for a decent price considering it's Kenneth Cole. It's a wool, cream color coat that goes down to my knees, with cream colored buttons down the front.
(Are ya happy now, Vicki? I mean, I know you wanna talk about clothes and fashion and other girly stuff, but goodness...can't we save it for our phone conversations so people don't know that we're talking about that stuff?)

Anyways....whoa! Russion Sailor's dance just came on NPR! Man. This brings back memories. Oh yes, by the way, if anyone has gigs they need a violinst for, please let me know, because I need to play...ANYTHING. Violin's become this thing that I pick up time to time only to demonstrate how to play Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star for my students. Isn't that sad?? Can we please get together and play some real music?

So my concert with Mabry is tomorrow night. I'll be conducting Brandenburg 3 with the 8th grade orchestra, so if you'd like a good laugh tomorrow night, I'll be giving you plenty of opportunity to do it. I always kinda feel silly waving my arms around like that.

Anyways, I've been doing a lot of thinking lately...life is strange, eh? Still stranger are people. It's funny how you lose touch with people who you used to be very close to. Sometimes when you get back together with those people, it's almost like times haven't changed at all, but then there are others where you can't have a conversation for longer than five minutes without the awkward silence (whoa, almost forgot how to spell 'awkward' there). I wish I could just keep in touch with everyone that I meet...well, not EVERYONE. Because there are some people that I don't really care for at all, and I'm sure there are people out there that don't really care much for me. Hmm...I wonder how many people feel that way about me. I HAVE been pissing a lot of people off lately. I've been so grumpy lately. Why am I such a bitch?

Oh yeah, for those of you who are keeping score, I started my period today. HOORAY! That means I'm not pregnant! That's good news, because if I was pregnant, that means I'd be carrying the next son of God, and who wants that kinda pressure? And I think if I were ever to become the mother of a devine being, I'd be expected to be a virgin for the rest of my life because the former mother of God's Son was. Dude...NO WAY.